Trouble getting along during that Thanksgiving meal?
The wonderful time of Thanksgiving can also bring alive all kinds of family tensions that have been simmering all year long. How you deal with it can make the difference between tearing your hair out, and having a relaxing holiday.
For many of my clients, there is at least one person they are nervous about seeing -- conflicting personality family members, ex-spouses, in-laws, or other potentially stressful situations. Try these tips to make your holiday more relaxing and enjoyable!
Tips:
1. Remember that another people's decisions, words, and actions are NOT yours -- you can't control others, regardless of how awful or mean they are acting. Let go of trying to control others, or anticipate what they will do, since you DON'T have that power.
2. You DO have power over yourself. Make decisions about how you will spend your holiday, with which people, and decide who you will talk with more, and who will get less of your time. Remember to keep your behavior, choices and actions in mind -- they are what you do have control over, and your actions influence others as much as theirs do you.
3. If you feel big issues brewing, you may want to look into therapy or counseling after you holiday is over. It can be a good time to get some clarity. If you instead feel like taking action to get your life where you want quickly, and already feel emotionally healthy/whole, then try coaching soon after the holiday.
4. Remember that this one time of year when many people gather from all over the country is only one short time in your life -- be mindful of the memories you want to create both for yourself, and others.
5. Keep a journal of your experience -- write your fears of interacting with family members, conflict situations, tense moments, or fragile relationships. Also write down any experiences after they happen to help you digest what's gone on and decide what you'd like to do about it.
6. Remember your happiness and life are in your own control -- everything is a series of decisions you can make.
7. Hopefully your holiday will be wonderful, and better than you expected! But if not, welcome the chance to learn about yourself, others, and what you really want and need to be happy.
Happy Thanksgiving!
For many of my clients, there is at least one person they are nervous about seeing -- conflicting personality family members, ex-spouses, in-laws, or other potentially stressful situations. Try these tips to make your holiday more relaxing and enjoyable!
Tips:
1. Remember that another people's decisions, words, and actions are NOT yours -- you can't control others, regardless of how awful or mean they are acting. Let go of trying to control others, or anticipate what they will do, since you DON'T have that power.
2. You DO have power over yourself. Make decisions about how you will spend your holiday, with which people, and decide who you will talk with more, and who will get less of your time. Remember to keep your behavior, choices and actions in mind -- they are what you do have control over, and your actions influence others as much as theirs do you.
3. If you feel big issues brewing, you may want to look into therapy or counseling after you holiday is over. It can be a good time to get some clarity. If you instead feel like taking action to get your life where you want quickly, and already feel emotionally healthy/whole, then try coaching soon after the holiday.
4. Remember that this one time of year when many people gather from all over the country is only one short time in your life -- be mindful of the memories you want to create both for yourself, and others.
5. Keep a journal of your experience -- write your fears of interacting with family members, conflict situations, tense moments, or fragile relationships. Also write down any experiences after they happen to help you digest what's gone on and decide what you'd like to do about it.
6. Remember your happiness and life are in your own control -- everything is a series of decisions you can make.
7. Hopefully your holiday will be wonderful, and better than you expected! But if not, welcome the chance to learn about yourself, others, and what you really want and need to be happy.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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